Saturday 9: Thunking on a Saturday

Here's my answers to this week's questions from the Saturday 9 Meme:

1. You are walking down a rainy road. There is a five hundred dollar bill on the road. You look around and except for someone a half block away, you are alone. You naturally pick up the bill and put it away. That person approaching stops and says, "I saw you pick up that money. It's mine." You ask how much it was. She yells, "Are you calling me a liar?" What do you do?

I'm guessing from the currency that I'm in America so I'm not going to argue with the woman just in case she's carrying a gun. I'd probably take out a ten dollar bill and give her that. If the 500 dollars wasn't her money, she'll not know I'm giving her the wrong amount so she'll continually happily on her way, leaving me $490 richer, otherwise she'll point out that I should have given her $500, I'll apologise and explain that I'm a foreigner and the bills all look the same to me, and then I'll give her her money, take my $10 back, and be on my way.

2. If I were to inspect your guest bathroom, how would I find it?

I haven't got a guest bathroom, so you'd have to go somewhere within the realms of your imagination to find it.

However, I've got a normal bathroom and if you inspected that you'd probably find yourself wishing I had a guest bathroom.

3. You are given a state of the art bow and arrow. Who or what is your first target (after a lesson or two)?

The woman from question one. I want my ten/five hundred dollars back.

4. The doorbell rings. The person at the door is wearing a raincoat and you know them. They flash you and are completely naked. Other than your S/O, who would you think it would be and would guess you'd find that funny? Why do you guess that person and would you laugh or be pissed off?

Hey, whoever it is, I'm just glad that they installed a doorbell for me.

5. What do you call a male Ladybug?

In the UK, we call them ladybirds, regardless of whether they're male or female, because, let's face it, it's pretty hard to tell the difference.

6. Your friends throw you a party. They've got a big national music star to come and perform. It is someone you detest. Do you make believe you like the songs or do you fess up and get the star out of the party?

If they've gone to all that trouble then I'll make believe I like the songs. After all, if it's someone I detest, then odds are it's the kind of music my friends will like.

7. What's your favorite breed of wild, mean attack dogs?

I quite like hellhounds, since they're the ones I'm least likely to come across.

8. If I called your high school guidance counselor, what would they say about you?

I never had a high school guidance counselor so hopefully they'd tell you you had a wrong number, or weave magical tales about me just to humour you.

9. Car A is moving at 63 miles an hour. 4 people are in the Car A. Car B is moving at 22 miles an hour. There is a driver and passenger who just came from a hotel while cheating on their spouses in Car B. They will crash into each other in exactly 3.5 minutes. What are your fun plans for this Labor day Weekend while these six people meet a brutal and gruesome death??

I'm too busy using the next 3.5 minutes to avert this tragedy (which will no doubt lead to fun Final Destination style hijinks for any survivors) to work out what I'm doing this weekend. First of all, I guess I've got to figure out exactly what kind of crazy road it is where cars would be travelling at both 63 mph and 22 mph.